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I wish I never did.
Our relationship was one of those where promises were said and you?re left alone thinking, maybe he?s not a bad guy after all. Maybe he?ll treat me a whole lot different.
There are moments between people when something happens, something non-physical, non-verbal, but mystical. It often doesn't make sense within the normal considerations of what usually contributes to such connection with the key factors being time and shared experience.
I end up all the way through the late hours of the night, unprepared. I have no energy left and too tired to fall asleep. I make an effort to decide in which direction to settle, which room, which comfort, if any?
When I was younger, I didn't know what came to me. I rode my bike and tried to go on a straight line wondering how far I would go. Dust and smoke hit my eye, rain poured, but I still went on. Finally, when my legs and feet felt sore, I would stop and look around to see where I am.
It's two-thirty in the morning in a Toronto condominium. In a contemporary kitchen, one can find a refrigerator, a stove, a dishwasher, a sink, a kitchen working area, a swinging door.
I turned to the stranger to my left. What was he doing on the 2:00 a.m. train headed downtown. Was he headed in for drugs? Some huge party? I was certain he was a shady character.
Have you ever felt like the world is revolving without you?
It alarms me how the earth could consume me up whole and nobody would even notice. Everyone seems to have to be somewhere, to meet someone, to do something, and they all pass by me with their little goodbye waves and farewells as they trek off to the next agenda on their checklist.
My life, as I know it.
Part one - the first time.
It was the night I could never forget for the rest of my life.
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